WWE Wrestlemania 33 – 2017 Predictions

WWE Wrestlemania XXXIII Predictions 2017 – April 2, 2017 – Predictions from Smartasses Magazine Senior Editor- Johnny Video.

WWE Wrestlemania 33 Predictions 2017 | Pay Per View Predictions – SMAG

WWE’s greatest annual tradition, WrestleMania, is the one day of the year when the entire WWE Universe and casual fans alike watch wrestling. From special ring announcer Al Roker to Tinashe performing America the Beautiful, WrestleMania XXXIII, streams live from Orlando’s Citrus Bowl this Sunday at 7 PM EDT. The action begins with a special two-hour WrestleMania Kickoff at 5 PM EDT, and the second hour will also air on the USA Network. Pitbull, featuring Flo Rida and LunchMoney Lewis will perform Greenlight, the official theme song for the event, and Pitbull will also perform Options with Stephen Marley. The New Day will be the official hosts of the show.


WWE Cruiserweight Championship Match
Neville (c) vs. Austin Aries

“Neville faces his most formidable challenge since declaring himself King of the Cruiserweights.”

Neville has dominated the Cruiserweight division with a newfound aggression, capturing the championship at the Royal Rumble and defeating all comers. However, Austin Aries has revealed that he’s ready to bring the Cruiserweight division to the “A-Double” level.

WHAT WOULD BE COOL: Aries wins and attempts to cash in the Cruiserweight belt to exercise Option C.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN: A must-watch match that sees Neville defeat Austin Aries to retain the Cruiserweight Championship.


SmackDown Women’s Championship Match
Alexa Bliss (c) vs. All Female SmackDown Superstars

“SmackDown Women’s Champion Alexa Bliss is in for the title defense of her life.”

WWE’s Wicked Witch will face Becky Lynch, Natalya, Mickie James, Carmella and Naomi. The gigantic title bout came together after General Manager Daniel Bryan ruled that any woman on the SmackDown roster would be eligible to vie for the division’s crown. The fiery champion won’t fall easily, and with her back against the wall, it’s frightening to think what she could resort to as she stares down the challenge of the entire Women’s division.

WHAT WOULD BE COOL: Stacy Keibler shows up and throws her hat skirt in the ring as well.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN: WWE didn’t exactly keep a secret of the fact that Naomi was back to full strength after she had to vacate the title in February due to injury. So the only question left is, if the belt will be gift wrapped or not when Naomi wins it.


The Fourth Annual Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

“Which Superstar will stand tall in the Battle Royal honoring The Eighth Wonder of the World?”

Since the annual Battle Royal was introduced at WrestleMania XXX in honor of the late WWE Hall of Famer, Andre the Giant, the over-the-top-rope extravaganza has become an opportunity for the winner to catapult his career to new heights. So far, the following Superstars have announced their entry into the annual brawl: Sami Zayn, Braun Strowman, Goldust, R-Truth, Curtis Axel, Dolph Ziggler, Jey Uso, Jimmy Uso, Chad Gable, Jason Jordan, Primo, Epico, Bo Dallas, Jinder Mahal, Rhyno, Heath Slater, Apollo Crews, Mojo Rawley, Big Show, Curt Hawkins, Tyler Breeze and Fandango.

WHAT WOULD BE COOL: Exactly like I said last year, all twenty men pull up Netflix and stream a B-movie on the jumbotron, because that’s precisely what this is.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN: Braun Strowman wins the fourth annual Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal.


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Raw Tag Team Championship Triple Threat Ladder Match
Luke Gallows & Karl Anderson (c) vs. Enzo Amore & Big Cass vs. Cesaro & Sheamus

“To win the Raw Tag Team Championships, one team will have to climb a ladder and grab the titles, hanging high above the ring.”

Since The New Day’s record-breaking 483-day tag team title reign was broken by the unlikely Swiss-Irish connection at Roadblock: End of the Line, the championship has been hotly contested among all three teams involved. With the addition of steel ladders to Sunday’s contest, the title bout is destined to be a hard-hitting fight.

WHAT WOULD BE COOL: The Ascension shows up, wins, and sends Sheamus back to KMart to peddle action figures in the toy aisle.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN: Enzo Amore and Big Cass win the Raw Tag Team Championship.


Intercontinental Championship Match
Dean Ambrose (c) vs. Baron Corbin

“Dean Ambrose’s indestructible nature will be put to the test at the hands of “The Lone Wolf” Baron Corbin.”

In addition to reckless and unpredictable, the champion is resilient. Ambrose’s attack mode is perpetual motion, but it remains to be seen whether his famously high threshold for pain will be enough to endure a battle with Corbin. Perhaps the heavy-hitting Lone Wolf will be the Superstar to finally shut down the unbreakable champion.

WHAT WOULD BE COOL: Corey Feldman shows up to perform synchronized dance moves with Ambrose, leaving the crowd to wonder, in that separated at birth kind of way, which greasy-haired goofball is the wrestler, and which is the washed up actor with a pathetic yet hilarious music career.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN: After a forty minute match, Dean Ambrose retains the Intercontinental Championship.


United States Championship Match
Chris Jericho (c) vs. Kevin Owens

“Two former best friends will unleash their anger against one another, with the U.S. Title on the line.”

Jericho spent months protecting The Prizefighter’s Universal Championship reign, only for Owens to torch their friendship on the Feb 13, 2017 edition of Raw. Jericho then repaid KO’s cruelty at WWE Fastlane, costing him the one possession that he cherished above all else, the Universal Title. Owens has since vowed to make Jericho suffer for his intrusion, and take the prestigious United States Championship in the process.

WHAT WOULD BE COOL: It’s not very often that the story outshines the belt up for grabs, so as long as this match doesn’t end in ten minutes, I’ll be content.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN: Kevin Owens defeats Jericho and becomes the new United States Champion.


Raw Women’s Championship Fatal 4-Way Elimination Match
Bayley (c) vs. Charlotte Flair vs. Sasha Banks vs. Nia Jax

“Bayley’s run as Raw Women’s Champion has been a dream come true, but she’ll have to deny her best friend, her most ardent foe and an unstoppable force to prevent a rude awakening.”

The beloved Raw Women’s Champion will defend her title against Sasha Banks, Charlotte Flair, and Nia Jax in a Fatal 4-Way Match at WrestleMania XXXIII that began in December when Charlotte wrestled the title from Banks in a grueling WWE Iron Man Match. Now, the four most dominant figures of the Raw’s Women’s division — the beloved champion, the dominant Queen, the rebounding Boss and the near-unstoppable Jax, will finally clash in an every-woman-for-herself battle.

WHAT WOULD BE COOL: Anything involving Paige, AJ Lee or Snoop Dogg.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN: Bayley retains the Raw Women’s Championship by defeating Sasha, Nia, and Charlotte.


Shane McMahon vs. AJ Styles

“Will the Commissioner of SmackDown make The Phenomenal One pay for crossing the line?”

Fueled by his belief that management was working against him, Styles ambushed the Commissioner of Team Blue in a parking garage on the March 14, 2017 edition of SmackDown, viciously slamming his head through a car window. But that didn’t deter Shane-O-Mac from limping his way into the arena to demand a showdown with his assailant. Though not an in-ring competitor by trade, McMahon is notoriously courageous any time he steps through the ropes, and The Prodigal Son is ready to go all out at WrestleMania.

WHAT WOULD BE COOL: Ric Flair interferes and takes The Phenomenal One under his wing again.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN: Styles defeats McMahon.


Non-Sanctioned Match
Seth Rollins vs. Triple H

“The student vs. the teacher. The Man vs. The Game. The creation vs. the creator. And not a rule in sight.”

After Rollins blew out his knee and was forced to vacate the title, The Game was less than pleased with his protégé for failing to follow up on his earlier successes, opting to write him off. Only Rollins wasn’t so content to stay sunken, and made it his personal mission to ruin what Triple H was now trying to create. Now, this road reaches its inevitable conclusion when “The Man” meets his maker in a battle only one will escape.

WHAT WOULD BE COOL: It’s already cool. It’s unsanctioned! Insert gasp here.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN: Seth Rollins defeats Triple H.


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The Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns

“Only one Superstar can run the yard in the WWE, and at WrestleMania XXXIII, the world will find out which behemoth that distinction belongs to.”

The showdown between The Phenom and The Big Dog, brings into conflict the most dominant force in WrestleMania history against the most powerful competitor in recent memory. But, as the WWE Universe knows all too well, The Undertaker takes on an almost supernatural power when competing at The Showcase of the Immortals.

WHAT WOULD BE COOL: If this is indeed Taker’s last WrestleMania, as has been rumoured, then it would be fitting if he put over the man that the WWE plans to be the backbone of the company. Since he’s already hated, hopefully the WWE does this correctly and has Roman Reigns go full tilt heel after beating the major fan favorite at the Ultimate Thrill Ride.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN: Undertaker is just simply too physically challenged these days, so, ala Ric Flair & Shawn Michaels, the Deadman says goodbye and goes 23-2 with this loss to The Big Dog.


Power Couples Collide
John Cena & Nikki Bella vs. The Miz & Maryse

“Two power couples collide to find out who SmackDown’s “It Couple” truly is.”

Maryse OuelletWhen John Cena & Nikki Bella square off against The Miz & Maryse at WrestleMania XXXIII, we will be witnessing a knockdown, drag-out melee with a ton of personal pride on the line for both sides. For years, Cena & Nikki did not acknowledge their relationship within WWE arenas. However, after two-time Divas Champion Maryse brutally assaulted Nikki with a lead pipe, and Miz and Cena eliminated each other from the WWE Championship Number One Contender’s Battle Royal, the rules suddenly changed, and all four Superstars began to rip one another to shreds on the mike. The Cenation Leader was a guest on Miz TV, badmouthing The A-Lister. Miz followed with an appearance on Talking Smack, calling Cena a robot. Fearless Nikki told Maryse to keep her hands off her man while Maryse retorted by calling Nikki Bella a fraud. In between the smack-talk and the tumultuous physical exchanges, a massive WrestleMania match has clearly been made.

WHAT WOULD BE COOL: The remaining 75% of this match’s card all bow down and worship Maryse like the god that She is.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN: A disgusting, “low hanging fruit” match that panders to the lowest common denominator of the WWE Universe, culminating in the heinous act of Nikki Bella actually getting the “feel good” pin on the deity that is Maryse.


Universal Championship Match
Goldberg (c) vs. Brock Lesnar

“As if the long-awaited mega rematch between Goldberg and Brock Lesnar wasn’t already big enough, The Beast Incarnate is now not only out for redemption, but also Goldberg’s newly won Universal Championship.”

Despite his world-beater bona fides, The Conqueror has never defeated his decorated opponent. Indeed, Goldberg has had Lesnar’s number since the first time they locked horns at WrestleMania XX, and after more than a decade away, Goldberg returned last fall and destroyed Lesnar at Survivor Series in 86 seconds. Paul Heyman, chalked up the loss to The Beast taking Goldberg too lightly and nothing more. Yet at Royal Rumble, Goldberg enjoyed the upper hand again, eliminating Lesnar from the event’s 30-Superstar brawl.

WHAT WOULD BE COOL: I’m sorry, as I realize that it’s the Sports Entertainment equivalent of eating a Twinkie, as opposed to kale topped with flaxseed, but I still like seeing Goldberg win in under two minutes.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN: Lesnar beats Goldberg to become the new Universal Champion.


WWE Championship Match
Bray Wyatt (c) vs. Randy Orton

“WWE Champion Bray Wyatt will collide with his former blood brother Randy Orton with the title on the line.”

Will The Eater of World’s furious rage be too much for Orton to handle? Or, will The Viper’s attempt at retribution become all the sweeter by defeating Wyatt for his most prized possession at The Ultimate Thrill Ride?

WHAT WOULD BE COOL: Orton does everything he can to defeat Wyatt, but Bray summons the power of Sister Abigail to nail the victory.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN: Orton triumphs to win his twelfth world title, but the rivalry with Wyatt will run deep into the Summer.


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